Just a little taste of the nonprofit experience.

Nonprofit work is great, but we do deal with all sorts of headaches. But many of our friends and families and even board members may have never worked at a nonprofit before, which means it’s hard sometimes for them to understand what we go through. Here is what it might be like for other professionals if they got the nonprofit treatment.

1. “Before I buy this cheese-and-potato piroshky, what is your plan to sustain your business without relying so much on customers like me?”

2. “Thank you for this taxi ride. I am a reimbursement-based customer. Please send in these forms and you will be paid in 4 to 6 months.”

3. “Good morning, I am your new Chief Surgeon. No I am not a doctor, but I did run a successful tech company for 32 years.”

Related article: 7 things my friends say about my nonprofit life

4. “I heard that you are trying to land a shuttle on Mars. I’d like to invest $500. I will need quarterly reports.”

non profit humour
Nonprofit work is great, but we do deal with all sorts of headaches.

5. “What do you mean you won’t accept my donation of 8 pallets of 1967-era math textbooks? What kind of accounting firm is this?!”

6. “Your shoes are really nice for a landscape architect! I guess maybe you don’t need me to pay for your design services, haw haw!”

7. “Why are there so many cafes all over the city competing with one another? Can’t you all just merge into one giant cafe?”

8. “I love this program. What do you call it, “seventh grade”? How do you plan to scale it?”

Related article: Nonprofit funding: Buying a cake and restricting it too 

9. “I don’t benefit at all when you vaccinate people against various diseases, so I have every right to scrutinize you and your work!”

10. “What you should do is open up the right pulmonary artery and connect it to the aortic semilunar valve. No, I’ve never done heart surgery, but I have served on the board of various hospitals for several years.

11. “Our family is not interested in paying for the salaries of the engineers and technicians who maintain and control traffic lights. We only want our taxes to pay for the traffic lights themselves. Since the city budget indicates a significant portion is going to salaries, we will not be paying our taxes this year.”

Read the complete list on NonprofitAF here

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Vu Le

Vu Le

Vu Le (“voo lay”) is a writer, speaker, vegan, Pisces, and the Executive Director of Rainier Valley Corps, a nonprofit in Seattle that promotes social justice by developing leaders of color, strengthening organizations led by communities of color, and fostering collaboration between diverse communities. Check out his other posts at www.nonprofitaf.com.

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