October 21, 2024

A bootcamp for clueless businesspeople

We all know somebody who could benefit from this.

3 min read

Day 1: Campers are gathered in the morning, divided into teams, and involved in a variety of icebreakers, starting with a scavenger hunt for edible items in their surroundings. Whatever they can find on the list during the scavenger hunt—acorns, dandelions, wild berries, etc., will be their lunch. This is to illustrate the Nonprofit Starvation Cycle. They learn the basics of nonprofit history, legal parameters, board duties and responsibilities, and other 101 stuff. After a dinner of hummus, pita, and leftover raw broccoli and cauliflower florets donated by various nonprofits after their community engagement events, the campers get back to their cabins, where they find the electricity and water completely shut off after 15 minutes. When they whine that they can’t charge their phones or take a shower, counselors will tell them that electricity and water are overhead, and since the camp is trying to cut down on overhead, they only get 15 minutes of it a day.

Day 2: Campers will be paired up with nonprofit mentors. Not for the mentors to impart wisdom about nonprofit work—but for them to give unsolicited advice about the campers’ day-to-day work. For instance, a camper who’s a restaurant owner would get advice on how to run his restaurant better. A lawyer might get guidance on legal precedents and litigation strategies. Etc. When the campers get irritated and start complaining because these nonprofit mentors don’t actually have any experience in law, entrepreneurship, used car dealership, software engineering, or whatever, everyone is gathered together to discuss how the activity went and how it felt. Counselors will reinforce the message that that’s what it’s like for nonprofit leaders when people who have no nonprofit experience think they have expertise in it start giving advice.

Day 3: Teams are given random materials and must build a small plane and try to get it to fly. The team with the plane that flies the farthest gets decent food for dinner; everyone else gets granola bars and whatever else they can scrounge up from around the camp. Halfway through the activity, though, counselors blast air horns and tell everyone they must fly their plane immediately or forfeit, forcing the teams to fly their plane while it’s being built. At night, as usual, everyone gathers around the campfire for scary stories told by counselors with flashlights under their chins: “Some say, to this day, the corporation still exploits its workers and avoids paying taxes, but then donates some money to nonprofits to launder good will. If you listen closely on nights like this, you can hear the desolate groans of thousands of people crushed by the weight of late-stage capitalism…

a cartoon of a person and a cat on a mat, with the person stretching and doing yoga--nonprofit humour
Picture courtesy: Rawpixel

Day 4: The basics of DEI are demonstrated through several activities, including a multi-rounds paintball competition. Instructions, including where supplies and ammos are located, are given entirely in Mandarin; teams without Mandarin speakers won’t be able to understand what’s going on and will just have to guess based on what everyone else is doing. Also, counselors can choose to give extra supplies and assistance to anyone they have built a rapport with during the week. Winners of each round get protective gears, ammos, and more powerful paintball weapons, which will help increase their odds of winning the next round. The last team standing gets additional electricity and water for their cabin. 

Day 5: Community service day. Campers are divided into teams and must work together to make nutritious, balanced meals for the people at the nearby homeless shelter. But there’s a catch: They must pay for ingredients, which range in price. Teams must also pay for electricity, cooking utensils, insurance, and other things. Parked around the camp are various counselors who have money to give. The campers must go around and convince these counselors to give them a few dollars. Some are nice and will give a few bucks willingly. Others will require the campers to do a little song and dance first. Many will give money, but with conditions. For example, one will not allow their dollars to be spent on things that are not ingredients, such as fuel or cooking utensils; another will only give some dollars if two other counselors commit to giving an equal amount.

Day 6: Campers sign up to demonstrate their talents during a fun and lively evening. But there’s a catch! Unbeknownst to them, on the night of the performance, they must draw a random talent from a basket and do that instead. Everyone watches, laughing as someone who is great at singing must now attempt to do aerial acrobatics, the brilliant guitarist must now beatbox, and the stand-up comic must figure out how to do an interpretive dance. At the end, it is made clear that just because you’re good at one thing (such as running a for-profit business or university), doesn’t mean you know how to do something that’s different (such as running a nonprofit or foundation).

Day 7: By the last day of the camp, campers should have a pretty good understanding of the basics of nonprofit work and be disabused of any misconceptions they had previously held. Campers and counselors share their takeaways in a tearful and cathartic conversation, there’s a graduation ceremony, and everyone gets a certificate and commemorative acorn to take home.

This article was originally published on Nonprofit AF.

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ABOUT THE AUTHORS
Vu Le-Image
Vu Le

Vu Le (“voo lay”) is a writer, speaker, vegan, Pisces, and Executive Director, Rainier Valley Corps, a nonprofit in Seattle that promotes social justice by developing leaders of colour, strengthening organisations led by communities of color, and fostering collaboration between diverse communities. Check out his other posts at Nonprofit AF.

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