1. One tablet to rule them all
The lone device that the fancy new app actually works on. It’s kept safely aside for supervisor/funder field visits.
2. The sacred signal spot
Under that one twisted tree in a field 2.8 km from the field office, where if you angle your phone just right you get enough signal to upload the data. Known only to migratory birds and frustrated field workers.
3. The uncapturable captcha
That flashes on your screen for all of 0.156 seconds when you are in hour four of struggling to upload data onto the government portal.
4. The “sync pending” notification
Lives permanently in the top-right corner of the app, contributing nothing besides reminding you that your data may or may not exist.
5. The powerbank of Theseus
Held together with rubber bands and faith. Has charged seven phones, three tablets, and one bluetooth speaker during village meetings.
6. The training PDF
A 57-page manual shared on WhatsApp that begins with “This app is extremely user friendly” and immediately proceeds to explain the 37 steps needed for setting up two factor authentication.
7. Offline mode
The feature demonstrated proudly during training that has never worked in the field.
