1
Two nonprofit leaders walk into a bar, and don’t leave until it closes. They are trying to forget the fact that they spent the previous week talking to their funders about why their frontline workers are paid INR 10,000 instead of INR 8,000.
2
A tech entrepreneur who has just sold his start-up walks into a bar. He convinces the barkeep to install Wi-Fi and a new music system, but leaves without buying a drink, claiming inefficiency. Two weeks later he opens a bar next door serving exactly the same drinks, at double the cost.
3
Two auditors walk into a bar. 7.12 hours, 6.75 glasses of water and 5.34 samosas later, they ascertain that the amount of salt in the peanuts is 0.13 grams less than what it says on the cover. The barkeep has to change the menu.
4
A government official from a developed country and nonprofit leader from the same country walk into a small bar in the Global South. They buy all the patrons a shot of tequila, and leave excited by the paradigms they have shifted. The patrons wanted a toddy but no one asked them.
5
Two strategy consultants walk into a bar. They spend the entire evening talking to the barkeep about alternative career options she could pursue. A month later, the barkeep shuts shop. However, every time she reaches out to them to ask for tangible steps to implement the advice they gave her, they disappear while repeating phrases such as ‘operationalisation framework’ and ‘strategy roadmap for transformation’.
6
A grassroots nonprofit professional, an outcomes payer, a risk investor, and an evaluator walk into a bar. The risk investor buys the nonprofit professional a series of drinks, the evaluator does a breath test on them, and the outcomes payer waits to see if they get drunk. Everyone insists that this is what will finally revolutionise the way nonprofit professionals drink.
7
Two public school teachers walk into a bar. They then walk out of the bar because public school teachers are not paid enough to be a part of this joke.
